Braceface Porn Story: Match Made In Heaven – Chapter 1

Match Made In
Heaven

by: Psycho
Moo

Disclaimer: I do not
own Braceface.

Just a reminder…

Italics- thoughts

bolded- IM
conversations

Chapter 1-

Over
It

Sharon sat at her desk
IM’ing her friend Maria from her laptop.

BlondieLovesMCR: Maria,
when’s the band’s next practice?

PoeticChik16:
said tomorrow at Alden’s house. 12 PM sharp.

BlondieLovesMCR: Oh
okay. I’ll be there. –

PoeticChik16: Oh come
ON Blondie. You know that the only reason you accepted to being the
vocalist was because ALDEN was there. I know you still have a thing
for him.

BlondieLovesMCR:
Nuh-uh. Alden and I have gotten closer than ever, Maria. He’s like a
brother to me…

PoeticChik16:
Yeah…right Blondie.

Sharon smiled as she
thought about her nickname. She remembered when she was first invited
into the band. It was just Alden, Brock, and Alden’s old friend
Jimmy. Jimmy had never met me, Maria, or Connor, so when he did, he
thought that Connor was a stuckup geek, Maria was a lesbo, and that
Sharon was a typical dumb blonde bimbo. Well, they proved them wrong.
Maria actually began to date Jimmy, and here they are a year later,
and still happy as ever. Connor became like the band manager, Maria
was like a co-manager and a co-songwriter as well. Sharon became the
vocalist.

Flashback

“So, guys.”
Jimmy started, and recieved looks from Maria and Sharon. “And
girls. What should we name the band?” he continued, looking
around for suggestions. Maria took a Pepsi out of her bag and started
chugging it down. “How many of those do you drink a day?”
Alden asked. Maria shrugged, “I dunno. Lost count.” and
kept drinking. “How about Pan?” Brock suggested. “Pan
is a Greek god of woods, fields, and flocks.” Sharon said, from
behind her book. Everyone turned to look at her and she shrugged,
“What? I read okay?!” “Okay. Any other suggestions?”
Alden looked toward everyone. “Succubus.” Jimmy answered.
“Succubus? Sounds too much like Incubus. But what does that
mean?” Maria asked. “Succubus is a demon that takes female
form and has sex with guys in their sleep.” Sharon once again
lowered her book to speak. “How do you know all this stuff?”
Brock turned to Sharon. “I read. And if you’re wondering,
Incubus is like Succubus except he just has sex with women in their
sleep…and doesn’t take on any forms. And why anyone would want to
name their band Succubus beats me.” Sharon went back to reading.
“What about Incubus?” Brock asked. “It can also mean
nightmare so I get that…but they were probably thinking about the
demon.” Sharon sighed, and put down the book. “Sardonic
Optimists.” she said, suddenly. “Which means?” Maria
put down her Pepsi bottle, which was empty. “Sardonic means
mocking and cynical…sort of negative. Optimists are happy positive
people…the two words are almost opposites.” Sharon looked to
see the groups reactions. “I love it. Great idea Blondie.”
Jimmy grinned.

“Blondie.
I like that.” Sharon smiled. “You know, we should have
nicknames for the band.” Alden commented. “Sharon could be
Blondie. Brock can be…” Alden looked around for ideas for a
name. “Pan. And Maria can be Pepsi. Jimmy…you can be
Succumbus.” Sharon turned to see Jimmy’s reaction. “Eww…a
dude that has sex with dudes. Hell naw.” he wrinkled his nose.
“That reminds me of a different word…Sukur. It’s a language
spoken in Africa. Sometimes you seem to be speaking a different
language.” Sharon shrugged. “I like it.” Jimmy nodded.
“Okay, and Alden. How about Eros?” Sharon turned to Alden.
“Eros? What’s that?” he looked confused. “Another
Greek god. The god of love. And Eros, in psychiatrical terms, means
the sum of all instincts for self-preservation…and the sex drive,
and stuff.” Sharon answered. “God,
he looks cute when he’s confused,” she thought, but did her
best to push the thoughts out of her head. “And I know the
perfect name for Connor. Zeus. He’s like the father of all of us.”
Sharon smiled. “Okay that’s great, so it’s Blondie on vocals,
Pan on drums, Sukur on bass, and Eros on guitar. And behind the
stage, there’s Zeus and Pepsi running the show and Pepsi also writes
songs. And all together, we’re the Sardonic Optimists. That sounds
awesome. We’re like the next No Doubt with Blondie leading.”
Jimmy playfully punched Sharon on the arm.

Present

PoeticChik16: Yo,
Blondie! You still there?

BlondieLovesMCR: Yup.

PoeticChik16: Like I
was saying…I still remember when you gave Alden his nickname!!
Eros!! Ha!

BlondieLovesMCR: I was
just saying that because I couldn’t think of what to say!

PoeticChik16: Riiiight!
Well I have to go. I’ll talk to you later. I’m meeting Jim at the
sushi bar.

BlondieLovesMCR: Yum!
Bring me some. Veggie please!!

PoeticChik16: Yeah
yeah. I know the drill. Bye!!

BlondieLovesMCR: Bye.

PoeticChik16 signs
off

Maria couldn’t possibly
be right, can she? She had gotten over the whole ‘Alden’ thing.
Yeah… over it.